A lesson on happiness vs. joy mixed with a little bit of Bessie

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What’s up with those happy people?

They are always smiling. When you ask how they are doing they have a bubbly answer. They never seem to have a bad day or be in a bad mood. Everything is good, no matter how bad! They are cheerful and positive. Rays of happiness ooze from their pores. Some days they are a wee bit annoying. Other days I want to be just like them! (Depends on MY mood of course)
It turns out these people are not happy. They are joyful. Happiness is circumstantial. Joy is not. Happiness comes and goes. Joy does not. Happiness is external. Joy is internal.

When you have joy, you live with a smile and a positive outlook because you have a firm foundation, knowing that no matter what happens, God is working things out for your good. You’re a child of God. Jesus died for you. You are loved. Your time here is short and then you go to heaven where everything is perfect forever and ever and ever. You are joyful!

Bad diagnosis? No big deal, still joyful.
Marriage on the rocks? That’s ok. Still smiling.
Lost your job? Eh, it will work out. Still joyful.

Easier said than done. Am I right?!?!

In my 38 years on this planet, I have only met 1 person that is joyful 100% of the time. One. That’s it. Numero Uno. I know a lot of people. You would think I could come up with a list of names. Nope. Just one.

Bessie.

It’s no coincidence I met Bessie on the day of my grandma’s funeral 8 years ago. After a stroke left her partially paralyzed, my grandma stayed in a nursing home for almost 2 years before she died. We knew it was coming but it was still hard because we were very close. My husband’s Aunt Debbie insisted I go see Bessie, who was also our neighbor at the time. She worked out of her home doing reflexology. After my first visit, I continued to see her about once a month, and over time it was hard NOT to notice how much Bessie smiled. She was ALWAYS happy. I have never heard a negative word come out of her mouth and she has never talked bad to me about anyone. She loves everyone. If you complain to her about something, she puts a positive spin on your problem. She is thankful for EVERYTHING. Seriously. I am pretty sure she has NEVER had a bad day. Ever. She doesn’t get bogged down with distractions. She is one of those people. She is JOYFUL.

So – what’s her secret? How does she do it? Well, oddly enough I have never asked her. But I also think when someone is that joyful, you don’t have to ask. It just shows. Their actions speak louder than their words.

She puts God first always. She does what He asks without hesitation or question, and spends a lot of time praying and reading the Bible and other books, believing that no matter what happens, He is in control. Bessie removes all unnecessary distractions and is always learning and growing. I know because I see it!

That’s it.

It doesn’t matter how many hours of sleep she gets or how much money she makes. It doesn’t matter if she is sick or if the weather is bad. She’s joyful all the time. ALL the time.

I’ve learned a lot from my visits with her and I always leave feeling completely recharged: physically, mentally, spiritually. That sounds so corny and I probably would have rolled my eyes if someone told me that years ago. But it’s true! Reflexology is one of my battery chargers. I have grown to love it and my mind, body & soul respond. More on that in another post…

I am getting the hang of this joy thing. I have happy days based on how things are going in my life. But I have an undercurrent of joy, some days more than others. I’m certainly no joy master or anything. For me, that would require A LOT of distraction extraction. Sigh. But I’m getting there. My hope for you is that you live a joyful life and let joy trump happiness. The more thankful you are, the harder it is to lose your joy. Pray that God will send a ‘Bessie’ into your life. Better yet, pray you will be a “Bessie” to someone else. Tell me about the ‘Bessie’ in your life!

Dear Lord,
Thank you for the constant promise of your love. We get so distracted with life and we lose our happiness when things happen that we don’t like. Help us to stay joyful through all of life’s ups and downs and to make you a priority every day.
Amen.

Isaiah 12:3 With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation

1 Peter 1:8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy

John 15:11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

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13 thoughts on “A lesson on happiness vs. joy mixed with a little bit of Bessie

  1. Definitely needed that, this week has been trying for sure…it’s only Tuesday. Thank you!

  2. I have a tendency to put a positive spin on the challenges of other people, which some find annoying, but I wouldn’t mind at all having a Bessie in my life. I easily forget to look at the bright side of my own challenges. Thanks for these clear reminders of the many reasons we have to be joyful. Even though I might forget, joy is always there waiting for me.

  3. Kim I love this post! Definitely a struggle for me that I fight for daily… you nailed it! Keep up the great posts I love the encouragement!

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