Overlooked Mama-I see you

Some days, if I could describe how I feel in one word, it would be overlooked.

Overlooked.

Do you ever feel that way? Like you just do and go and give and no one notices or cares? There are things I do that no one even realizes need to be done.

I see you.

I have embraced these things as part of my mom and wife role, and for the next few minutes I am going to break my own rule and complain!! Not about what I do, but about the fact they seem to always go unnoticed. I am thankful for my kids and husband and I know these responsibilities are a blessing. But wouldn’t it be nice, just once in a blue moon, to feel like they notice? I don’t need a skywritten message or big production. I don’t need flowers or a card (although they are a nice surprise) Just notice.

I see you.

Mom, you took us across 4 counties in a snowstorm to get us all where we need to go. Mom, you make us dinner, schedule my appointments. My teeth are clean, my needs are met. The laundry is done, food is bought and cooked, money is in the bank. Just notice.

I see you.

We are expected to go through life at a normal pace — despite dreadful hormone swings and a lack of sleep. Hormonal anxiety is a real thing and it blows. A few years back, I sat at a stop light worrying about my kids going to prison some day because they might text and drive and cause an accident. Since my oldest was 13 at the time, this seems like a little premature. But I did it anyway.

Thank you PMS.

Any other time of the month I would experience much more normal worries, such as human trafficking and norovirus…ha.

Someone once told me about a book called Red Tent. I’ve never read it but apparently in this story, women retreat to a special, quiet place each month while menstruating. Sign me up for that fantasy land. We could sit around and cry and laugh and eat together for 3-5 days.

This all sounds nuts but my mood swings and craziness has gotten ALOT BETTER than a few short years ago.

My husband can’t relate. What man does? We leave for a weekend and things at home are magically taken care of, ready to go, bases covered. It goes overlooked.

I see you.

Over time, these feelings wear away at you like sandpaper. The sore breaks open and BAM – psycho mom makes her appearance. She doesn’t typically stay long, thankfully. Then psycho mom morphs into guilty mom. Regret covers you like a heavy blanket.

I see you.

Then there are times we are completely impossible to please. “I want some time alone.” Then we get it and after a few short hours, we don’t know what to do with ourselves. We want a trip away but when we get there, we miss the kids. Sigh. We just can’t be pleased.

The bible tells us to put others needs before our own. To give and not count the cost. Work for the Lord. He notices even when no one else does. I believe this is true. I also believe it is REALLY, REALLY hard. Can’t He just send a message. An angel. A sign of appreciation from someone. Anyone. Please. Anyone. Bueller. Bueller.

I see you.

Tired, overlooked, hormonal mama. We are doing good things, even if no one notices. Most days we do them joyfully and don’t even notice that no one notices. We don’t want or need recognition because we are just doing what moms do. But, on the days we just can’t shake that overlooked feeling, just remember, you are not alone.

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