My Women’s Retreat Experience AKA Jesus Camp 2019

A few weekends ago, my friend Whitney and I went to a Women’s Retreat (which we playfully nicknamed Jesus Camp)

She grew up spending weeks at Lake Ann Camp during the summer. This was my first experience.

When she asked me to go, my mouth said “yes” but my head said “no.” I searched the calendar secretly hoping I would be busy. But this weekend, nothing. Crap.

I was excited and reluctant all at the same time.

I had a month or so to prep (worry) about it.

Before I knew it, the weekend was here. The anxiety started creeping in Friday morning and by the drive there, it was full force. My fitbit actually recorded a full day worth of fat burn heart rate, even though we spent most of the day in the car.

How stupid am I? Schedule a weekend away to relax and get refreshed, then stress about it and make it the exact opposite!

Despite the anticipation and anxiety, I was quickly reassured by the beauty of this place!

The entrance has a cute sign and the prettiest tree lined drive, which sadly I did not get a picture of. (Think beginning of the wedding shower scene of Bridesmaids, without the lemonade) haha

Upon check in at the welcome center, my anxiety started to ease up a little. We unpacked in the cabin and went exploring. The lake was so peaceful and very quiet.

There were so many cute, random places to sit.

Friday night we had dinner and a session with the speaker, Shannon Popkin, about her book on giving up control to God. This is something I really struggle with, so it was the perfect message for me to hear! And the chapel was beautiful.

There were a lot of fun activities. We did a high ropes course which was absolutely terrifying but fun. I had a slight internal panic attack during instruction, and even though I was scared out of my mind, I did the quick jump (kind of like a bungie jump) I was the first one of our group to do it, which is a HUGE milestone for me. I like to see things before I do them! You stand at the edge of the platform and just step off. Just take a step. Um what? I wish I could have taken a picture from the top. It was terrifying. But I did it!! Whitney chose a different course than I did.

Here is a photo of her in the cocooon of death which you wouldn’t catch my clautrophobic butt anyway near!!

During free time Saturday we went into Traverse City and stopped at a winery on the way. It had gorgeous views and was set up for a wedding that afternoon. Awe. We did some wine tasting, then went shopping and got some of the most delicious fro-yo I have ever tasted.

The weather was perfect, the scenery was great, and we had an awesome time!

If I had to do it over again, I would!

Likes:

VERY peaceful, quiet, and beautiful.

A variety of fun activities and free time to do what you want

24/7 access to coffee/tea (fellow caffeine addicts will understand)

Dislikes:

Sharing a cabin/bathroom with strangers

The moral of the story? Years ago you would not have caught me dead at something like this! But at this point in my life, it was the perfect getaway at the perfect time. And the topic was on point for me. The whole experience made me realize I have come a long way, yet still have a long way to go. Gotta step out of your comfort zone to grow!

Kim and Ally’s Favorite Podcasts

I’m probably a little behind the times (OK fine, A LOT behind) but in an effort to make the most of my time, I have started listening to Podcasts. I’ve heard several people talk about them lately, including my niece Ally, home on a visit from Boston. I decided to check them out and it didn’t take long for me to find some favorites. Since I’m so new at this, I am including her favorites as well! True Crime is such a popular category, but you will notice those are absent from my list. No worries – Ally has you covered! I am basically afraid of my own shadow, so listening to True Crime is NOT a good idea for me. One episode of Dateline and I’m convinced a murdered is lurking in the woods.

Thus far I have focused on those in the scope of mind, body, soul health and wellness. Since I typically listen while I’m getting ready in the morning or during my commute once the kids get out of the car (which is only about 10 – 15 minutes) I prefer shorter podcasts I can listen to in 20 minutes or less. I’ve tried listening at work but I find it too hard to focus.

I will post an update in a few months once I’ve had more time to explore. But for now – here’s our favorite podcasts!

Kim’s List

Optimal Health Daily

Dr. Neal Malik

This podcast reads the latest and greatest health and fitness blogs and also has Q&A Episodes. I like these because they are short (usually 15 minutes or less) and cover topics I find interesting. A sister podcast to this is Optimal Living Daily, which reads content on personal development, productivity, and more.

Daily Inspiration

Steve Harvey

A daily dose of inspiration from The Steve Harvey Morning Show. I like him, although sometimes he’s hard for me to take serious because, well, he’s Steve Harvey! (Think Family Feud) This shows a different side of him and I have enjoyed it so far.

The Mindset and Motivation Podcast

Rob Dial 

(Soon changing names to The Mindset Mentor.) This is probably my favorite podcast. The episode about his 10 day silent meditation retreat was so interesting. I actually know someone who attends a retreat like this every year. 10 days without talking! #Meditation goals. I’ve had several good takeaways from each episode and have stayed engaged with very little mind wandering! I love his tag line at the end: “Make it your mission to make someone else’s day better.”

The Daily Still

Cindy L. Helton 

At first I listened to this on my way to work, but for me, good meditation requires closing my eyes. Not a great idea when you’re driving! So I moved it up in my day. I have a morning routine that works well for me, which you can read about here. I have been listening before I get out of bed, however the last time I got so relaxed I almost fell back asleep! Oops. Because of this, I’m thinking about actually moving this one to the end of my day right before I go to sleep.  They are short, which is great if you are new to meditation.

The Nutrition Diva

Monica Reinagel 

Information on easy ways to upgrade your eating habits.

Ally’s List

The Daily

The NY Times

20 minute news podcast – new 5 days a week. If you like a quick news recap, this is a good option.

Serial Season 1

This American Life

A podcast from the creators of This American Life. It unfolds one story over the course of a whole season. If you like murder mystery, this might worth checking out.  As for me, I’m skipping this one!

Gladiator: Aaron Hernandez

The Boston Globe: Wondery 

“Football star Aaron Hernandez went from the bright lights of the Super Bowl to a convicted murderer in a few years. The Boston Globe’s Spotlight team takes a hard look at the crisis facing football through the lens of Aaron Hernandez’s life and terrible crimes.” This one looks interesting and Ally enjoyed it. I plan to check this one out!

The Moth

Ally says this one is really good. it’s about people telling their stories. Some are funny, some are sad. She actually went to a live show and loved it! She lives in Boston so more exciting things happen there compared to my little town of Grass Lake, Michigan. No live podcast shows here!

What the Health

Kaiser Health News

Weekly Healthcare news. She has a degree in Public Health so it makes sense this is on her list!

If you’re new to the world of Podcasts and don’t know where to start, check out your favorite categories. You can find pretty much anything: Art, Comedy, Fiction, Business, News, Sports, and more. It’s a great way to fill your time! Let us know some of your favorites! Thanks to Ally for her awesome suggestions.

Are You A Score Keeper

Are you a score keeper?

I’m not referring to the score at your kids soccer game.

Do you keep score?

Funny enough, I accidentally stumbled upon an app on my phone that does just that! Scorekeeper is a Google app that keeps score of whatever you need: a friendly rivalry, good deeds, swear jar. Their sales pitch- if you can score it we can keep it.

Keeping Score

Early on in our marriage, I was a scorekeeper. I could have given you a list of things my husband did that I did never got to do. I spent my time and focus on making that list even.

He went out with friends.

I went out with friends.

He slept in.

I slept in.

He bought something he wanted.

I bought something I wanted.

The convo went something like this:

“Well you did X so I should get to do Z.”

Despite my immature behavior, he was never really much of a scorekeeper, which is probably why we are still happily married!

No Winnners

I can promise you when someone keeps score, no one wins! Now, I’m not saying you should be a door mat and never get to do anything you want to do while your mate lives it up. Scorekeeping is doing something just because your spouse did it.

When you keep score, it’s easy to let your list pile up. They did A, B, C and you file that away somewhere on the scorecard. Then when they do D it’s the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

We have grown older, been married almost 15 years, and had 3 kids. During this time I have learned life isn’t all about me! Really?! Well that kind of sucks! But it’s true. And, when you find someone you love, you want the best for that person.

Fast forward to now- we have a pretty successful marriage by trying to fill up each other’s score cards rather than keeping score for ourselves. That’s not always easy because the world tells us to take care of ourselves, our needs come first, we deserve it. I am an advocate for self care. I can tell when I haven’t been taking care of myself. I get grouchy and start snapping at the kids. But if I spend ALL my time taking care of myself, then that’s not good either.

Natural Born Scorekeepers

Our kids are natural born scorekeepers.

Me: “Girls feed the dogs.

Them: “It’s Emily’s turn I did it last time.”

They know exactly whose turn it is or isn’t and they will tell you! How peaceful would it be if they just did it without arguing? Maybe someday I will be able to report back to you on that one.

The bottom line: Don’t keep score. Worry about yourself. Put others needs ahead of your own.